Bandwagons
A bandwagon is defined as “when someone adopts a popular point of view for the primary purpose of recognition and/or acceptance by others.”
A bandwagon (in the context of stan wars) occurs when a music fan attaches himself to the scrotum or clitoris of an artist because it is
popular or trendy, not because that artist is a reflection of their actual tastes or preferences.
Liking an Artist==/== Joining a Bandwagon
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Just because you find yourself liking an artist, that doesn’t mean you’re jumping on a bandwagon. Bandwagoning occurs when the idea of stanning for someone becomes more important than actually going and supporting them and trying to figure out what makes them special and talented — assuming that they are special and talented.
Bandwagoning occurs when you are mainly interested in any cool points that can be derived from this artist and once you’re done with them, you toss them aside for the next trend.
Recent Bandwagons
Adele
Why you joined the Adele Bandwagon: Because she snatched the wigs, weaves, ponytails and bangs off of our favorite artists whilst sitting in a chair.
Why You Should Stay On the Adele Bandwagon: Bertha can sing. Point. Blank. And the Period. No extras, no frills, no ratchet Instagram pics, no publicity stunts, no rapper collabos, no faux relationships, no crotch shots. That hussy can sing and that’s all that matters. Over-hyping aside, Adele is refreshing because it’s important for the next generation of singers and musicians to see that it is possible to make it in the music industry on just talent alone.
Frank Ocean
Why You Joined The Frank Ocean Bandwagon When Frank Ocean announced that he kissed a boy — and liked it — I imagine that somewhere in heaven, Sylvester dropped down into a nasty duck walk, while Luther Vandross did a sickening hand performance.
It was a major victory for every queer and questioning male R&B artist who was ever denied the right to occupy his sexuality as fully and openly as his straight peers. It was a bold move and, surprisingly, the reaction was overwhelmingly positive.
Why You Should Stay On the Frank Ocean Bandwagon: Unlike Trey Brown or Chris Songz, Frank’s success is not based on selling pipe dreams to basic bitches. Yes, he is attractive and I’m sure that plenty of girls still want his cack, but he has built a multi-ehtnic, multi-genre, cross-generational appeal that ensures that he is not 100% dependent on the 106 & Park demographic. Yes, the bisexual angle only adds to his alt-indie-hipster-underground appeal, but Frank actually has the talent and potential to make R&B/Urban/Black/Colored music creative while not detaching it from the soul and history which made it special in the first place.
His announcement has forced Black music fans to have an honest discourse about why certain images and ideas are acceptable and others aren’t. It’s okay to sell crack cocaine, shoot somebody in the face, beat a woman half to death, piss on minors and be generally aimless ignorant and ratchet, but if an intelligent and talented man just so happens to like licking the tips of penises, then that’s wrong?
In the many Frank Ocean debates and conversations that emerged, the main question has been “Why does it matter?” and fortunately the consensus seems to be “it doesn’t”.
Lana Del Rey
Why You Joined The Lana Bandwagon:
Lana, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways:
Your photos look great on my Tumblr and on my Instagram. Your songs have quirky titles, so listening to them makes me feel smarter and more complex than I actually am. The bulk of your songs are mid-tempos and ballads, so you were able to trick me into thinking you would be an amazing live vocalist.
Your lips and boobies are plumped and perched and your hair is always laid like every L’Oreal commercial ever made. You appeal to both the annoyingly pretentious indie snob and the annoyingly shallow pop-loving chimp that lives within all of us.
You are the greatest thing ever.
Sincerely,
Everybody
Why You Should Stay On the Lana Bandwagon:
Benefits of Joining Bandwagons
It Forces Other Stans To Take Your Tastes Seriously
Hopping on a bandwagon of an artist, particularly one with indie credibility, forces other stans to take your musical tastes seriously. You may feel slightly guilty for stanning for an artist who has the talent and stage presence of uncooked spaghetti, but hopping on certain bandwagons sends a powerful message:
“I bought 21! I DO care about vocals! I DO care about talent! TAKE ME SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Gives You A Break From Your Own Shallowness
If you ever get around to actually buying and listening to the music you pretend to like online, you may find yourself actually enjoying the artist and discovering similar artists with similar styles.
Disadvantages of Joining Bandwagons
It Is Just as Superficial As Regular Pop Music Stanning
In some bandwagons, when the cool points and the “different for the sake of different” allure fades, you are stuck with some harsh realities:
“Wait a minute, this person sounds like absolute dog shit live.”
“These lyrics are a bunch of random words strung together.”
“This sounded a lot better when Prince did it 29 years ago.”
Often, when dealing with artist bandwagons people are responding to the aesthetic of what they think a real artist is, as opposed to fairly evaluating the vocals, songwriting, and production. In that regard, bandwagon stanning is no different from stanning for any random pop tart — you are still valuing packaging and image over talent and proficiency.
An Artist’s Most Popular or Acclamed Album Is Usually Not Their Best Album
I think this is self-explanatory.
The “I Was Here First” Syndrome
When dealing bandwagons, someone is always bound to get salty, just because they joined the party a few minutes
before you.
“Look at you bandwagon stans, I was a fan before all of you!”
“Oh, yeah? I was a fan during the first album.”
“I was a fan during the first mixtape!”
“I was a fan back when his name was ________________”
“I was a fan when he was in Kindergarten.”
“I stanned for his mom when she was pregnant with him.”
And so forth…
Reverse Hipster Bandwagons
A reverse hipster bandwagon occurs when someone who would ordinarily be deemed uncool by current musical trends, suddenly and inexplicably becomes cool and massively successful.
Examples:
- Tracy Chapman (1988)
- Sinead O’Connor (1990)
- Alanis Morrissete (1995)
- Fiona Apple (1997)
- Norah Jones (2005)
- Amy Winehouse (2007)
- Adele (2011 – until Jesus comes back)
Bandwagons That Turned Into Respectable and Profitable Fanbases
- The Coldplay Bandwagon (2002)
- The Lady Gaga Bandwagon (2008-2009)
People With Successful Careers That Had Bandwagon Moments and Became Even More Famous
- Whitney Houston (The Bodyguard era)
- Usher (The Confessions Era)
- Prince (The Purple Rain era)
- Michael Jackson (The Thriller era)
Bandwagons That Should Have Lasted Longer
The following artists had the talent and potential but could not round up enough pretentious queens to properly stan for them and start a full-blown bandwagon movement.
- The Corrine Bailey Rae Bandwagon (2006)
- The Duffy Bandwagon (2007)
- The Janelle Monae Bandwagon (mid-May 2010)
The Slave Revolt Against Beyonce KnowlesThe Jennifer Hudson Bandwagon (2006)- The Jessie J. Bandwagon (2011)
The 2nd Slave Revolt Against Beyonce KnowlesThe Kelly Rowland Bandwagon (June 2011)
Spiteful Bandwagon
Spiteful bandwagoning occurs when you become “fans” of one artist just to spite another artist:
Examples:
- 42% of Rihanna’s internet stanbase
- 96% of Rita Ora’s internet stanbase
- 52% of the people who pretended to like MDNA
Post-Mortem Bandwagon
A post-mortem bandwagon occurs when an artist dies and suddenly everyone realizes how talented and influential they were.
Examples of Post-Mortem Bandwagon
- About 54% of 2Pac’s current Internet fan base
- About 89% of Aaliyah’s current fanbase
- About 50% of the current Whitney Houston internet stans (as if you cared about vocals any other time)